


Without Them

by SecondFromTheRight



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Caryl - Mentioned, Gen, Missing Scene, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-20
Updated: 2018-03-20
Packaged: 2019-04-05 00:34:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14032263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SecondFromTheRight/pseuds/SecondFromTheRight
Summary: “He started it all. The group? It was Carl,” Carol said as she stepped into the room that Rick had retreated to. She’d waited until he was alone to come find him, needing the privacy. She’d found out in front of everyone in The Hilltop yard. She didn’t want that again. Carol quickly brushed away the tears starting to fall as she looked at him. He was sat on the end of the bed, leaned over and looking the picture of lost. Rick turned his head to acknowledge her but remained in his position “On the highway, to Atlanta, he walked right up to Sophia and made her laugh. It was chaos, but Carl made my little girl smile,” she added, her own smile in place. “And Lori…she was a best friend when I hadn’t had one is so long,” Carol looked around the room as she spoke, a gentle smile still on her face even as her eyes remained tearful. Rick bowed his head as he listened. “He never lost it. That goodness? We did, we…we have. The things we’ve done, that we’ve had to do…” she trailed off. “But he never lost it.” She nodded, still looking around at nothing in particular.Missing Carol and Rick scene from 8x12.





	Without Them

“He started it all. The group? It was Carl,” Carol said as she stepped into the room that Rick had retreated to. She’d waited until he was alone to come find him, needing the privacy. She’d found out in front of everyone in The Hilltop yard. She didn’t want that again. Carol quickly brushed away the tears starting to fall as she looked at him. He was sat on the end of the bed, leaned over and looking the picture of lost. Rick turned his head to acknowledge her but remained in his position “On the highway, to Atlanta, he walked right up to Sophia and made her laugh. It was chaos, but Carl made my little girl smile,” she added, her own smile in place. “And Lori…she was a best friend when I hadn’t had one is so long,” Carol looked around the room as she spoke, a gentle smile still on her face even as her eyes remained tearful. Rick bowed his head as he listened. “He never lost it. That goodness? We did, we…we have. The things we’ve done, that we’ve had to do…” she trailed off. “But he never lost it.” She nodded, still looking around at nothing in particular.

Rick closed his eyes over and tilted his head. His body sagged further. “I let him down. Lori too. I let them both down.”

Carol moved to join him, the bed barely reacting to her weight as she sat down next to her friend.

“I used to think Shane was a great father. It was so clear that everything he did was for them. Compared to Ed,” she stopped herself at the mention of her husband, shaking her head, the memories, away. “But the day you walked into camp with the others? And Carl ran up to you?” she paused as they both thought back to that day, when it truly all started for them. “Everything you've done, to get here…it was for him. And he knew that.”

“I didn’t do it alone.” Rick argued as he briefly lifted his head to look at her before turning away again.

“No, you didn’t,” Carol easily agreed. “I think that’s what matters. It’s the difference. Shane did it alone. Shane against the world. He refused to let the rest of the world in, didn’t trust anyone. That’s not you, and it wasn’t Carl. That’s how you didn’t let him down,” Carol looked at the grieving father next to her, his shoulders hunched. “Rick,” she prompted quietly. She wanted to help him, but she didn’t want to be alone in this.

“How do you go on, Carol? Without her?” Rick questioned with a hoarse voice. Carol stilled at the nameless reference. “How do I…” he jerked forward in a cry.

Carol took his hand, thankful when he immediately gripped hers back. “For Judith. You have to. You will,” she replied, her voice strong with confidence that had Rick gripping tighter. “And you’re not alone. Carl made sure of it. He helped bring you and Michonne together.”

Rick leaned back and reached his left arm across his body and sat it at Carol’s elbow, holding onto her more. She leaned her head against his shoulder as they sat there. He didn’t say anything about the stain her own tears started to make on his shirt.

“Like you and Daryl?” Rick asked, tilting his head and looking down at her. The change of subject may have been less emotional for him, but it was just as raw for her. “I remember how he was back then, at Hershel's farm, looking for Sophia, looking out for you.”

“Rick,” Carol cautioned with a whisper. She sniffed and shook her head against his shoulder. She wasn’t ready for that conversation, not now, and not with anybody but Daryl himself. It was too much.

Rick gave a subtle nod, accepting her want not to talk about it. After a moment, Carol gave a soft sigh. “He made me smile again, after, when I didn’t think I ever could again. I wouldn’t have survived those months without him, in any way,” She finally offered. “She'll need you as much as you'll need her, Rick.” She added. Rick gave a comforting squeeze, his hold still on her elbow.


End file.
